Whatcha Weigh Monday?

happy monday :)








well, after a GAIN last week, I was terrified to go back to WW. but i sucked it up and went. I went for two walks the whole week. that is LAME. but whatever. off i went come 8AM this morning annnddddddd

-0.4

yippeeeee. exactly TEN pounds to go for my goal :)

the best part about this? normally when I have gained weight in the past, I would torture myself with insane amounts of exercise and insane boring food (chicken breast and broccoli for dinner EVERY NIGHT FOR A WEEK). it was almost like my "punishment" for that +.6 the week before.

This week, I refused to let myself do that to my body.

I took care of it, and was rewarded.

so yeah. just how far have i come?

last night, I decided that my parents and I were going to have Dairy Queen Blizzards while we watched the Oscar's.

I took their orders and off I went.

After literally almost running over a cat in the drive-thru line (how awkward/horrid would that be?) I had a realization.

For probably the past 4 years or so, Sunday night's consisted of me making my new "plans"

this was really going to be the week that I lost weight and got healthy.

no more sugar.

work out at least an hour every day.

yep. THIS week. starting TOMORROW.

so to celebrate my New Monday morning beginning, I would frequently go to DQ and get a blizzard on Sunday nights. I would eat it in my car before I got home and dispose of the trash. I would get a BIG one, because I told myself that I better enjoy it, because for the rest of my life I would NEVER have a blizzard again. NEVER.

Yep. I felt guilty. I felt shame. I felt STUFFED because I would eat it, even if I was not in the LEAST bit hungry. I didn't enjoy it, because I would shovel it down between stop lights.

Last night?

I didn't have to hid my icecream. I was PROUD to order it, and eat it on the couch in front of the TV. For the first time in like seriously FIVE years, I didn't feel shameful eating a DQ blizzard.

that might not seem like a big deal, but for me. it was monumental.

and that my friends, is progress.

aaaaand I still lost this morning at weigh-in.

Seriously though. They were times I cried and cried and cried for days at a time that I would never be normal. I COULDN'T just have a little bit of icecream like everyone else. One bite would lead to one gallon, which would lead to tighter jeans come Monday.

if I can do it, you can do it ;) seriously.