sigh. happy monday.
i have a heavy heart for the Turner family this weekend.
I mean yeah it's weird. I have never met these people, never even been to Arkansas but I have read Julee's blog for a few years (through her struggles with infertility) and have read about her daily life with her husband matt (who is a news anchor in AR) and their 10 month old daughter, Preslee.
This weekend Matt was killed in a car accident and leaves behind Julee and 10 month old Preslee. They had just moved to be closer to family.
for those of you who know me, ya'all know I am PETRIFIED of anything death related, get physically ILL when I think about losing a loved one and commonly have breakdowns about one of my parents dying.
I start to panic and almost hallucinate when I think about something in my life passing away, and before I know it I have effectively started a panic attack.
The love that Julee and her friends/family have for Jesus has done something to me.
While I don't even know this family and I still burst into tears on Sunday morning, I have this weird calm about me when I think about the Julee and her sweet baby girl in the coming years.
While I can't even BEGIN to fathom how Julee is feeling, she posted this today and I was amazed at her ability to see beyond the grief and despite how hard it is, KNOW that the Lord has a plan, as hard as that may seem at the time.
i mean really. a couple tries and tries and tries to have a baby and their precious daughter, who is the absolute love of their life, only got to spend 10 months with her daddy on this earth? that's a hard one to fathom.
I feel like Jesus likes to talk to me in code a lot of the time. Sometimes I just can't figure out what his big picture is, what exactly he wants me to do.
But then there's times like this, he makes it rather clear and simple for us.
Thanks Julee, I am praying SO hard for you, and thank you for teaching me about His plan, in comparison to ours.
you give and take away, you give and take away,
my heart will choose to say, Lord blessed be your name.
Oh my gosh! I cried when I read about Matt too! I have been way behind reading blogs lately. Then yesterday I started reading Kelly's Korner, and I read the first line and it said that Matt's funeral was today, and I got a horrible feeling in my gut. Something told me that it was Julee's husband. I started crying at work. Her and Matt got married the same year as Chris and I and then Julee was born a couple of day before Hayes. Reading about Matt's death, rocked my world! I am almost afraid to let Chris out of the house. It really kind of has me freaked out!
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